“What makes you beautiful?”

“What makes you beautiful?”http://www.wavemag.com.np/issue/article3955.html

FROM ISSUE # 195 (March 2012) | IN THIS ISSUE
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As women we are constantly bombarded from all sides about the way we ought to look... and I am not just talking about the blue eyed, blonde hair tall, waifish girl fashion magazines say we ought to all aspire to be. Nepal, for a country with this many ethnicities and tribes, is shockingly rigid about what we should look like. And common rules of courtesy don't apply in this country... for anyone, your neighbour's interfering mother-in-law's second cousin, or the chiya pasal wallah, family, friends, teachers, the micro bus conductor... all and sundry are at complete freedom to yell out at the top of their voices what they do not like about your appearance, your size, your structure, your hairstyle, you.

Many of us, not wanting to face this barrage of criticism everywhere we go, dress to merge with the crowds or try to best disguise our 'imperfections'. And then you notice these women, regular everyday women, who walk tall, with poise and seemingly unconcerned by the judgemental voices around them and you tell yourself, "Wow, look at her!".

This month WAVE speaks to seven such women and asks them,

Name: Ruby Gurung Age: 20 Occupation: Student

Are you happy with the way you look?Yes.

What two things do you love about your body?My eyes and hair.

If you could change parts of the way you look, what would it be?My height

What do you love about yourself?Everything! :)

How often do you think women's magazines really speak to you?Rarely.

What have your moments of low self-esteem taught you?It has taught me to become more confident of myself and my life

Nepali society expects women to look a certain way; thin, straight hair, light-skinned etc. What do you have to say about it? We are beautiful the way we are and no one has the right to judge us.

Name: Shikha Sunuwar Age: 17 Occupation: Student

Are you happy with the way you look?Very.

What two things do you love about your body?My hair, i guess? (If it can be counted as a part of my body ) and the colour of my eyes ! (They're black!!  )

If you could change parts of the way you look, what would it be?It would be nice to be slimmer.

What do you love about yourself?The way my mind is open! Seriously, i wouldn't care how you looked or talked like. If we can chat on a similar topic with a smile on our faces, you could be my new best friend!

How often do you think women's magazines really speak to you?I'm not that much into reading magazines, especially "women's magazines" at that

What have your moments of low self-esteem taught you?Be whoever you really are inside and do whatever you want to. Only then will you be doing your best.

Nepali society expects women to look a certain way; thin, straight hair, light-skinned etc. What do you have to say about it? To be honest, i don't really give a rat's ass about what anyone thinks. If i did, i wouldn't be and love the Shikha that I am today.

Name: Esha Manandhar Age : 25 Occupation: Student. Kathmandu University/Department of Music

Are you happy with the way you look?Yes, this is how and who I've been my entire life, and this is who I shall be.

What are the two things you love about your body?First, definitely my hair. I love my curls, thanks to my parents genes, and secondly, the fact that I have curves. I am what I eat. I strongly believe, that real men go for curves rather than bones.

What do you love about yourself?This is a tough one to answer, but I love myself for being who I am, this person who has zero tolerance for nonsense, who is very vocal about her thoughts and who speaks her mind.

How often do you think women's magazines really speak to you?Honestly; hardly ever. I will flip through the pages but I dont follow trends, I dont follow what's written. in one issue they say something is good for you, and in the next the same is bad.

What have your moments of low self-esteem taught you?People will always try to bring you down, but from all this and people will always TALK, even if your're good or bad at what you're doing, people will ALWAYS talk. As long as you're doing what you feel is right, the people who pretend to be nice to your face but talk behind your back do not matter.

Nepali society expects women to look a certain way, thin, straight hair, light skinned etc. What do you have to say about it?It's not just Nepali society. Size zero is what everyone is after, but I'm comfortable being who I am. I have curls, I am not thin, I dont use make up and though I am fair skinned, I have freckles, and I am absolutely fine with them. As the old saying goes, this is who I am: take it or leave.

Name: Shanti Pun Age:22 Occupation: Student

Are you happy with the way you look?Somewhat unhappy

What two things do you love about your body?Hair and legs

If you could change parts of the way you look, what would it be?My face structure

What do you love about yourself?Almost everything

How often do you think women's magazines really speak to you?Sometimes

What have your moments of low self-esteem taught you?One has to be confident and happy about oneself.

Nepali society expects women to look a certain way; thin, straight hair, light-skinned etc. What do you have to say about it? I  do not like the way Nepali society expects women to look a certain way. People are beautiful just the way they are and the Nepali society must change their views.

Name:Trishna Rana Age: 25 Occupation:Desk Editor at Nepali Times

Are you happy with the way you look?It depends. Sometimes I am absolutely comfortable with my body and could not careless about what other people say or think and then there are days where I havea lot of self-doubt. In college, I was very confident because I knew my professors, friends and colleagues would judge me on the basis of my intelligence, my personality and work ethic and not on how much I weighed. But in Nepal, I hearthe "M" (moti) word a lot, from relatives, from random strangers on the streets. I feel like many Nepalis are almost shocked to see a plus-size person like me and ask all sorts of personal questions. All this upsets me from time to time.

What two things do you love about your body?I love my short hair. I think it makes me stand out from the crowd, because many girls my age want to be very 'feminine' and are scared of the 'boy's cut'. And I might be plus-size but I am also super strong

If you could change parts of the way youlook, what would it be?I would like to go down a couple of sizes.

How often do you think women's magazine speakto you?I hardly read women's magazines and I certainly don't agree with their narrow definitions of 'beauty' and 'desirable' lifestyle.

Whathave your moments of low self-esteem taught you? I try not to stay in the 'low' phase fortoo long. A couple days is fine, but after that it can get really hard. I tell myself that I am smart, funny and talented and how I look on the outside or how people perceive me in the short term should not change that. Also talking or being with friends who refuse to notice my 'flaws' always helps.

Nepalisociety …  I try not to let myself be affected by those 'expectations', but it's very tough. I wish those categories did not exist and that we were more accepting of people who fall outside the box.

Name: Shenmi Rai Age:21 Occupation: Student

Are you happy with the way you look?Yes, of course. I am happy with the way I look and on the skin I live in.

What two things do you love about your body?For me, the two things I really love about my body are my toes, fingers and hands.

If you could change parts of the way you look, what would it be?If I could change parts of the way I look, it would be my eyes.

What do you love about yourself?The best way to love is to love ourselves. I also love to make others happy, at times of sadness, pain and sorrow.

How often do you think women's magazines really speak to you?I think women's magazines really speak to me a lot. It taught me about the power of feminism, strength, capability and the will of being a woman.

What have your moments of low self-esteem taught you?My moments of low self-esteem have taught me to be happy with what we are/have because we were born this way.

Nepali society expects women to look a certain way; thin, straight hair, light-skinned etc. What do you have to say about it? To be beautiful, women do not have to be thin, light-skinned with straight hair. Each and every woman is beautiful in their own way. Some Nepalese women are naturally beautiful.

Name: Parina Subba Limbu Age: 32 Occupation: Programme Director, Dristi Nepal

Are you happy with the way you look?Of cours

What two things do you love about your body?My heart and my eyes

If you could change parts of the way you look, what would it be?Nothing. I love myself and every part of my body.

What do you love about yourself?I love that I can appreciate everything around me.

How often do you think women's magazines really speak to you?Most of the time  especially Editor's note.

What have your moments of low self-esteem taught you?To see everything and be positive. To seek opportunities in every problems.

Nepali society expects women to look a certain way; thin, straight hair, light-skinned etc. What do you have to say about it? Bullshit ! Every woman is beautiful especially Nepali women.